I’m terrified of the world I must attempt to live in.
I have SO much love for everything. I understand myself, my path in life, but I just CAN NOT understand everyone else.
I realize everyone has their own opinions, but when I see starving children, I get tears in my eyes, and I don’t understand how every single person in this world doesn’t feel the exact same way as I do.
It’s amazing how things can CHANGE a person. Although there will always be pain, arguments, and disaster, we could still make this world so much better than it is now.
How do I go into the world as a young adult, to this horrific planet of hurt and insanity, and try to change it?
…I know that I’m going to change someone’s life, and try to even change the world… but because of that one fact: Everyone has their own opinions; we will never fully live the amazing life’s we could.
If everyone thought of the possibilities and happiness we could accomplish by changing EVERYTHING in the world, it would be 100x’s better than it is now.
Unfortunately, most of you suck.
Reading a few of these journals, I realized that I have not kept in touch with anyone I went to college with. I graduated in 1977. I have such fond memories of Ann Arbor and all the people I knew there—how could I have left them all behind? How much richer would my life have been if I had kept in touch?
I’ve never met anyone who I’d live my life for. There are a lot of people who I care about and who I would die for, but no one really who I could imagine the world without. I hope that it all changes. I don’t know if those kinds of interactions are weak—like the really passionate connections. It makes me believe that it’s real and I shouldn’t give up yet, but maybe there are problems with any kind of connection. We just idealize stuff to make it better. There are some people who I really love though. People that have come close. I just wonder. It makes me not want to stop meeting new people ever. Never give up! I never want to have to use another person, though. It has to be mutual. It scares me not knowing what’s real, though. I know I’ve believed and trusted things, people, and ideas that don’t mean anything, but maybe it’s because I don’t let them, or maybe it’s because because they just don’t. Maybe one day everything will fall apart, and I’ll just know that what I feel is 100% real, no lies, but maybe when I wake up the next day, it won’t mean anything. I want to know that the moment when it felt right was real and not just a brainwashed feeling. I don’t know if it even fucking matters, no one has really made me feel that way. One day… One day, though.
I don’t know who I am anymore… But I guess even if I did, it wouldn’t change anything
I don’t know if you realize what amazing feat you have accomplished here, but people who take the time the time to care about other people’s lives give me hope.
I want to make a difference in the world. To leave a small, but significant mark in people’s lives. Not everyone, I realize that is impossible, but some people’s.
I have started this journey already, my mind is full of faces of people that I have, in fact, helped in one way or another.
But I still feel overwhelmed. Like I’m running out of time before I’ve even gotten started. I feel like more people should feel this way…to take the burden off of people like me. Off of me.
The world is a beautiful place, filled with amazing people. Each one a gift to the rest of the population.
And yet, we tear away at each other.
All in all, I just want to say, I believe I will change the world.