My mom told me that when you go to heaven, God gives you all the balloons you lost when you were alive. The only part that sucks about that, is that I’m afraid of balloons. I know what you’re thinking, something along the lines of, ‘who’s afraid of balloons?’ Yeah, I’ve heard that before. But when you think, and I mean really think, you might be able to understand my logic behind it. Since you don’t actually know how I think yet, I’ll explain it this once. It’s like this: Picture yourself holding this pretty, shiny balloon. You’re holding this balloon when all of a sudden, the balloon hits something that’s barely even sharp or pointy, like the goddamn ceiling or something. The balloon pops, but not in a way that it’s like a bubble popping and it makes no sound. Nope, when this balloon pops it’s like a mini explosion. It’s basically a time bomb, but you don’t know when the boom happens. My beautiful play toy just scared the crap out of me. No, God, you can keep those balloons that I set free. Give them to someone else that loves being scared at random times. Someone that’s truly messed up, but that seems like everyone.
I’m 19. I feel like I’m already dried up. I feel like I have nothing left to offer this world.
I’m ashamed of myself. When I was younger, I was beat, I was molested, I was told I was a nothing. Yet, I stood tall during those times. I’m not ashamed because those things happened. I’m ashamed because at seven years old I had more confidence and hope in myself then I do now, at 19.
I have wonderful friends who are there for me when I need them. I honestly couldn’t ask for anything more. They are my angels. They are my reason for being here. I’m just afraid that I may not be strong enough to stay here for them. I wish I could tell them how dead I feel.
I’ll continue to pray to a God I don’t believe in anymore for the strength and hope to keep living. I wish I were seven again.
Being molested. Being hit. Being told I was worthless…
I still had my whole life in front of me.
I am 22 just graduated two months, did not think it was going to be this hard, decided not to go back home. Decided to stay out here where I tought I belong, so far I been doing whatever job the wind blows towards me. I am happy I am grateful God has blessed me with good people every where I go. But I am scared. I am scared that this is all its going to be, living paycheck from paycheck without nothing else. I am scared that I will not move forward and Ill be stuck in this same setting. But I am hopeful I have faith. And I will keep walking.
I am 15 and I’m pregnant by a 20 year old. It’s not the best way to live a normal teen-aged life but I deal with it as it comes at me. I feel so lost I miss my ex, he has my heart and always will. You really don’t understand how scared I am about all this and I have never really told anyone about my feelings toward all this until now. Im 15 I’m “emo” but more recently I have found god. I cried in church when they prayed for me.
For the first time in my life I felt like there are good people in this world. I don’t know what to do anymore but I’ll take it as it comes
After two and a half years we are ending our relationship and he is moving to Texas. He’s still my best friend and I still love him—I guess I was not ready for the commitment and the distance was too hard. It doesn’t feel fair though—like this is not how things are supposed to work. But who ever said life was fair? If I was just too scared, I hope some day that will change. Is it weird to hope we get another chance someday?
I don’t really believe in “meant to be.”
I wish I still believed in God, because then I would say “Well, it’s all part of God’s plan.” I would feel like there’s some sense to all this.