I have $24 in my bank account, and I start work in one month. Work, unfortunately and fortunately, is in San Bernardino, California. I have never been there. The story, I guess, will be getting from here to the desert on $24, and then the details.
I work as a receptionist for a popular company. The girls in the office all have our favorite people to talk to. Mine so happens to call in once every few weeks from Coast Wholesale. Trying not to sound like a stalker I get excited when I get to talk to him. It’s like bumping into someone you have a crush on. Even though the conversations are fairly brief. It’s the highlight of my week all the time.
I am 30 years old. I live in my parent’s basement. They did it to help me go to college. I am currently working full time and going to college full time. I feel like I will never leave their basement. My fiance left because of it, but he wasn’t working to help out. I don’t think I’ll ever find someone else due to low self esteem from weight issues. I wish people could see past the few pounds I’m overweight and actually give me a chance. But, as shallow as people don’t like to see themselves, they are. It has given me the worst self esteem out of anyone I know. I wanted to write to maybe hopefully change one persons mind about the way they view other people. Just because someone is slightly overweight, does not mean they are dirty, trashy or stupid. We know we’re heavy. You don’t have to give us dirty looks, some of us try to not be that way but it is hard. Look what you’ve done to my self esteem. My weight comes from a surgery that went wrong. I did not eat myself into oblivion. Look what you did to my trust. No one wants me.
Six days before my 60th birthday, I lost my job. After nearly 10 years with the company, I was told bluntly, “We have to let you go. And I’ll have to supervise while you pack your stuff.” After all those years of 50-mile-round trips to do my best job to support someone else’s company, there was no thank you for your loyal service, no sorry to see you go. I was stunned not so much by the news but by how suddenly I went from an employee to an enemy of the company who was not to be trusted. I was escorted out a back door and not allowed to say goodbye to the people I’d worked with for a decade. I’ve since realized why there is no long a ‘personnel’ department, but ‘human resources’. I was not a person, but merely a resource that was no longer of use, so tossed out the door. 2 weeks later when I finally got my termination letter, my manager had written the wrong job title, and didn’t even get the term date correct. The only thing worse was my coworker let go at the same time … the day before her father’s funeral. The total lack of compassion left me reeling. I’m not sure I’ll ever again be able to look at a job/company as more than just a paycheck.