Entries tagged with "dating"

Entry #0308

When I turned 21, I went to the bar and met a cute 24 year old German guy. We flirted and agreed to meet for dinner after he was done with work a few days later. He showed up at the restaurant for our date looking dashing and brandishing a Kroger bag. He said he had a surprise for me, but I had to wait for dinner.

Inside, he started the conversation: “For work, I do internet research, so I look you up…” he had written down the times for races I had run, when and where; poetry that others with my name had written; high school info, sports articles, and “your records.” I thought he’d hacked into the school system to find my grades, but really he had found my online journal from my studies in France, where I mostly wrote stories of crashing my bike into different bushes and trees. He felt it was important enough to take notes and read them back to me.

I then pretended for another half hour that he wasn’t totally creepy and made some small talk over mediocre pizza. He felt we should go dutch, so I split the bill, and then he revealed his grand Kroger-bag surprise: eight packets of photos.

“I went to Thailand last year; I’ve also been to South Dakota. What do you want to see first?” We had discussed neither, nor travel. I chose Thailand.

Somehow he managed to grope my breast and thigh before the night was over. I’m still not sure how that happened.

That was the last I ever saw of him, although I did get a hopeful email invite the next day.

Entry #0230

My friend is dying due to an addiction to heroin, cocaine, pills, syrups, basically anything he can take to get fucked up. We dated for five months, then I finally left him thinking he was using me for sex. He wasn’t. But he isn’t this way because of me—it was the girl before me. I can’t decide what’s worse, the fact that my friend is going to die and there’s nothing I can do, or that I’m jealous that I’m not the cause.

Entry #0037

It seems everyone my age lives for relationships and sex. When I tell people that I haven’t dated they think something is wrong with me because honestly I’m not ugly and I have a pretty good personality but I just don’t think wasting your emotions and time with someone when your my age (18) is smart, cause most people I talk to regret dating or spending so much time with a guy that breaks your heart or turns out to be a jerk. What’s my point? My point is I am saving my virginity for that one night after my wedding, I am saving all my feelings for one man… so I have more to give.

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